Believe it or not

I am reminded this week, as I put my family back on 'a schedule', why I adore schedules, routines, jobs, rules and expectations.

I have let the kids weekly jobs completely go this summer. Heck, I let my own go. Completely.

In anticipation of School and Football (read completely overwhelming until October) I sat down and forced myself to get back into routine.  I may have mentioned a time or two or six how naughty my kids are lately and how I'm so ready to send them off to school for someone else to deal with.  So I went all Super Nanny on their butts and made up an excel spreadsheet of what was to be done when and where.

They are back to bedtimes and wake up times and morning rituals and chore charts and dinner jobs and well, discipline in general.  You know what has happened? Well first they threw Guiness World Record fits with weeping and wailing and nashing of teeth and then-then-THEN they feel right into it like it was meant to be. And their wailing has been brought down to maybe 1/3 the original. Because who am I kidding, I still complain about doing the dishes so I can't expect them to totally quit.

And as I was on the other side of the room with Ryan and Jena washing the walls and railings they had a little talk that I'm sure they thought I couldn't hear.

Ryan-I like this zone cleaning thing.
Jena- What's zone cleaning?
Ryan- You know, this new thing mom's doing where we clean upstairs on Monday and the kitchen on Tuesday and downstairs on Wednesday.
Jena-Oh, yeah, me too. Then were not like, cleaning ALL day. {insert major Jena dramatics here}
Ryan-Yeah, believe it or not, Moms pretty smart like that.

He'll never admit to saying it, of that I'm sure, but it sure has shown in the attitude change around here. Both theirs and mine.

Mom 1 point and I'm pretty sure the Kids get 1 too!

From a lucky girl

Parenting Styles

CJane posted about her Easy Style Parenting last week and it really got me thinking.  I am much the same way and always have been.  When Ryan was born Barry was the one running around like a crazy person, worrying about every little thing and I was more laid back. That is until I about had a mental breakdown because I started second guessing myself. Maybe I should be more like him, maybe I'm not a good mom, maybe I need to worry more and not be so strict.  I got over it quickly.

The funny thing is I would describe myself as both more laid back parent and the more uptight parent, it just depends on what parenting aspect we're talking about.
I don't run to my childs side every time they fall.  I used to think maybe something was wrong with me, my mother was constantly gasping and having heart siezing attacks every time one of my children would so much as waver in balance and I was completely unaffected.  Having a boy for my first child did not affect me in the least. He could have blood dripping down his face and my heart beat wouldn't so much as speed one extra beat.  My kids learned early that if they wanted lots of drippy simpathy than they better find Daddy.  I'm happy to bandage and wipe away tears, hug, kiss and send you on your merry way to go play some more.  Barry is happy to cuddle and ooooo and ahhhh and all that extra stuff.

However if you want to get my heart racing just try and cross me when it comes to daily chores and routine around the house.  My kids have daily jobs and weekly jobs. I expect homework done immediatly after school. I expect respect and manners. I am the drill sargaent at home, Barry not so much.  He thinks he expects it, he likes that I expect it, but he's way to soft to enforce it.  He claims he grew up with it but was always got away with not doing it. Which is not a surprise. His mother is still that way. I see no sense in spouting expectations and rules and not enforcing them.

I'm not really sure why I'm going into all this other than having just read an article about this and it has my head spinning with frustrations and resolve to do better myself.  I tend to think I'm an 'old school' style parent.  I love my kids, I want them to be happy but I don't intend to make them happy or find their happiness for them.  I think one of the best things I can do for them is to teach them to live in the real world.  You have to work, you must know how to deal with disappointment, you must have a sense of humor, you must learn to make your own choice and deal with it when you have no choice.  I think the hardest part of it all is teaching it while still learning it myself and teaching it with love and patience.

I'm currently in the process of regaining routine and order from a summer of slothfullness on my part.  There is nothing I love more than a good routine with scheduled times to do nothing.  And my children have lived that way since birth so when we let the routine go, everything else goes with it, respect, disapline, good attitudes. And what replaces it is entitlement, selfishness, argueing...  I find when I stop expecting my kids to be active parts of the family and house  than they stop being as good as they can be.  So it doesn't matter how many times I hear that 'so and so doesn't have jobs', it makes no difference to me, my kids will always have jobs and be expect to have one at 16 and pull their own weight and I don't expect they will stop complaining about it any time soon.

From a lucky girl

Homestead Weekend

My awesome sister always takes the whole family to The Homestead in Midway every August and we always have a great time!

Jena's hair was pretty much actually this color by August with all the swimming we did.

I so wish I could have gotten a picture of Barry shoving Teri into the pool. 

Hilarious!

My Handsome Husband!

The Whole Fam Damily after the BBQ Banquet where we won $310 in a raffle!

Freaking Awesome!

And no I'm not prego, sadly enough it just looks that way. sigh...

Cute Jake trying his hardest to crawl. 

And he did start army crawling this weekend.

I love all the random activities they have every night.

This night we got to sit and listen to the guy tell funny story's and cowboy poetry.

If you've never heard cowboy poetry you are missing out!

He made each of the kids a plaque with their birth dates burned in them.

Playing shuffle board

Granny and Jake trying to stay awake and watching the fire and cowboy.

Grandpa and Jena listening to the poetry.

Teri and Jake

Thanks Teri! 

We had a great time!

Kansas and Back

 We took a long fun drive to Kansas to see my brother Bart and his family.

{Who am I kidding, I went to see Karen not Bart! :) sure do love ya Bart!}

I taught Allie and Jena to finger knit and they also took a Hip Hop Dance camp and had tons of fun.

Spencer and Ryan went to a Basketball camp too.

For some reason I didn't get many pictures but this is my nephew Matt and he is adorable!

 Giving Jake a kiss...so cute!

 

I think we fit Jake in there for a minute too!

Then we all drove back together and they spent a week here.

Jake swinging at my moms.

The girls skateboarding at our house.

We played tourist at Temple Square for the day.

Jake loves the camera.

My cute girls

All the grandkids minus Jake.

Sara pulling one of her faces

Ry and Spencer...they are quite the pair and they had a blast together!

We don't get to see enough of them!

July

I'm going to post date a bunch of stuff and try to catch up.

Jena participated in North Ogden's Cherry Days Pagent and had a ton of fun.

{all those pictures are on my mom's camera...i think?}

But she also got to ride in the parade, which was the only reason she wanted to participate in the first place.

Ryan and Sara watching for Jena

Jena is way back in the shadows

Here she is after she was done.

I just realized how much older she looks since we cut her hair short.

I honestly haven't a clue where Sara had been here, my moms or Teri's I'm sure, but I just loved this picture.

Swimming with Teri

Jena and Syd and Katie's bday party.

Jake had just started to roll over on his own here.

Ryan and Sara and Katie's party.

Jena and some friends playing in the fire hydrant.

Baseball

From a lucky girl

Busy, Busy month of May

Jena is participating in the Little Miss Cherry Days Pageant.  They call it a self esteem pageant and I guess every girl gets a title.  We aren't really into pageants but my friend's little girl was doing it and talked us into it. Jena is having fun so that's all that matter's I suppose.

This is Miss North Ogden teaching the girls how to walk and answer questions.

The pageant is in 2 weeks so we'll have some more pictures of that.

This little man got his first haircut with Daddy.  We did the same thing with Ry at 3 months and it all came in blond.   Jake's seems to be doing the same thing.

Barry loves having his picture taken as much as me, can you tell? ;)

He is getting really fun, talking and giggling, sucking his thumb and he loves to eat his bibs.  I can't wait till he stops spitting up so much so I can stop putting those stupid bibs on him!

He also loves to hang out in this jumper.

Hmmm, how am I gonna get that back?

And the other 3 can not resist him when he's in it.

He gets swinging and flying lessons pretty often.

Jena also had her 1st grade program in which she was a lady bug and sang a solo part.

Ziah, Kelbee and Jena

I'm told by Ryan that she got the giggles when they performed for the school but for the parents she did great!  She totally takes after me however and gets terrible stage fright.  We will be starting dance in the fall again so hopefully she can learn to get through that.

This is one of her best friends Emily.

Such cute girls.

Sara was so proud of Jena and was dieing to be up there with her.

Only 5 more days of school! Woo Hoo!